Encouragement

A mother giving a star to her son.

Today I wrote a note to a boy, because he made a new friend. You might wonder why, since this is quite normal, but it is something I have never seen him do before.

The context is this: He is a boy who is great friends with another boy, because he is crazy about sharks, and the other children don't like it when he always mentions sharks. Sharks. Sharks. Sharks. I do get annoyed hearing him mention sharks EVERYWHERE. I work in a Catholic school, so even his prayers are all about sharks.

After I wrote the letter, his behaviour really improved. When he was going back, he was smiling.

Of course, this is not easy. Impossible, even. I am a generally positive person, but I have to be firm with the kids. Sometimes work stress does get to me, and I must confess that some of it goes to the children. Seeing colleagues being firm will no doubt force me to do the same.

But I believe positivity is more powerful than negativity. Speaking words of encouragement will really go a long way. As educators, while it is important to be firm with kids, we must be careful that our words don't come across as too hurtful.

It is always easier to say words than to hear them. Calling someone stupid might be harmless, but it can crush a person. Children are even more vulnerable. I might just stay in their memory for the rest of their lives; better not be a source of pain or negativity to them.

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Loved and Unloved Children

A mother hugging her child.

There are two boys. Boy A and boy B.

Boy A is adored by his parents and grandparents from both sides of the family. His achievements are celebrated and honoured. He is always so cheerful in class, both to his peers and teachers. Though he is a little bit shy, he is comfortable with showing his work to others.

Boy B has a broken family. One parent is passive, so the pressure is on the other. He gets scolded daily. When asked what he did wrong, he could not answer. He would apologise, but then do the same action again.

It takes a village to raise a child. While children learn social skills and moral values in school, it does not mean that parents do not have to inculcate values in them. It is a partnership between parents and teachers to nurture the child. I am not a parent yet, but I do understand the struggles parents have to go through. I am thankful that I get to see them for only a few hours daily. But then, there is not enough time.

Values like honesty, loving others, respecting others, etc, must be taught both at home and in school. Children must be empowered and encouraged. I really don't like to scold children. The negative words or tone can actually break them. I have tried saying something positive or giving a gift as encouragement, and it helps to build them.

Faith, hope, and love. Love is the most important.

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Tell Me Your Story

A storybook.

Yesterday, a boy came to me and told me he was writing a story. I told him to show it to me, and after thinking for a split second, he said it was not done. This boy is more open with his friends and quite shy with me. So I really treasure this moment.

There is also another boy who is addicted to sharks. Everything has to be about sharks. He is someone I have classroom management issues with. He would often inject sharks into any random topic or discussion, to the annoyance of his peers. He shared with me that he has only one friend, because the rest don't like it when he mentions sharks. But I believe there is a deeper meaning behind his fascination. Usually, kids will not be so fixated on one thing.

I read a book to the class, and I mentioned that I chose the book for him. It has a picture of a shark inside, though that was not the focus of the story. Throughout the day, his behaviour improved.

Honestly speaking, I love the first boy more than the second. I confess this sin. But I am still learning to love every child equally. It is obvious that when you empower children, they feel more confident, and you notice their behaviour becoming better.

Every child is different, and we teachers should cater for their needs. Right now, I am preparing the children for their K2 graduation. The process is very child-directed, from the theme to the song choice to the costumes, though as a teacher, I have to plan the dance and formation. But it is more majority-based than individual-based. Even during normal lessons, I am behind the syllables. I try to ensure the children complete the worksheets, and I would go to each group to teach them if they need help. So the children will usually do the worksheets or practise their dance.

In the context of the classroom, it is usually teacher-directed. It takes more effort on the teacher's part to make it cater to individuals. We are not their parents, so it is easy to classify each child as "1 of the 25," or "3 of the 15."

But each child is an individual, with their own unique stories to tell. If we invest more time in allowing each child to share their stories, we might see miracles.

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